🏛️

MINISTRY OF VISA AFFAIRS & BUREAUCRATIC PROCESSING

Democratic People's Republic of Absurdistan - Official E-Visa System v0.7.3 (BETA)

🔒 SECURE CONNECTION

10:00

TIME REMAINING

Personal Employment Security Documents Payment

SECTION 1: PERSONAL INFORMATION

* All fields are mandatory unless marked optional (no fields are optional)

Title *

First Name * (as shown on passport, or how you wish it was shown) Must match passport EXACTLY (we will check very carefully)

Middle Name(s) * (all 17 if applicable)

Last Name / Family Name / Surname / Patronymic *

Name you go by at parties (for security verification)

Date of Birth *

Year dropdown starts from 1823 for historical accuracy

Country of Citizenship * Scroll down. Keep scrolling. A bit more.

Passport Number * Include ALL characters, even the ones that look like smudges

Mother's Maiden Name Before She Was Born *

I confirm that I am a human being and not a sophisticated robot pretending to need a visa

SECTION 2: EMPLOYMENT & FINANCIAL STANDING

⚠️ False information may result in visa denial and/or light imprisonment

Current Employment Status *

Monthly Income in USD * Be honest. We have ways of knowing.

How many bank accounts do you have? * Include secret ones

Employer Name * (refer to bank statement)

Have you ever worked in a circus? *

Do you consider yourself "financially stable"? *

SECTION 3: SECURITY ASSESSMENT

🔴 ANSWER TRUTHFULLY - Our AI can detect lies with 47% accuracy

Have you ever committed a crime? *

Have you ever THOUGHT about committing a crime while dreaming? *

Do you intend to overthrow the government of Absurdistan? *

Are you, or have you ever been, a member of a book club? *

What would you do if you found a wallet on the street? *

Please rate your trustworthiness from 1-10 * 5 - Suspiciously Average

CAPTCHA: Select all images containing BUREAUCRATIC DESPAIR

Click to select. Some images contain multiple forms of despair.

SECTION 5: PAYMENT OF FEES

💰 Fees are non-refundable, non-transferable, and non-sensical

Fee Calculation:

Visa Processing Fee: $47.00

Administrative Surcharge: $23.50

Technology Modernization Fee: $15.00

Paper Conservation Levy: $8.00

Convenience Fee (for using website): $12.00

Inconvenience Fee (for our staff): $12.00

Fee Processing Fee: $5.00

Mystery Fee: $???

Exchange Rate Fluctuation Adjustment: Calculating...

TOTAL: Calculating...

* Total may change while you're reading this

Payment Method *

Card Number * We promise this is secure (our intern set it up)

Expiry Date *

CVV * (the 3 secret numbers your bank told you never to share)

I have read and understood the Terms and Conditions (all 4,782 pages)

I agree to receive promotional emails about Absurdistan tourism (mandatory optional)

I understand the Ministry is not responsible for any stress, confusion, or existential questioning caused by this process

⚠️ Do not click more than once. Do not refresh. Do not blink.

📁 YOUR DOCUMENTS

Click to enlarge. Squint if necessary.

PASSPORT

FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF GENERICA

🦅

😐

Surname: SMITH-JONESON

Given Names: ALEX MORGAN TERRY

Date of Birth: 15 MAR 1989

Passport No: XK7842991-B

Nationality: GENERICAN

Expiry: 22 DEC 2029

P<GRCSMITH<JONESON<<ALEX<MORGAN<TERRY<<<<<<
XK7842991B<GRC8903155M2912224<<<<<<<<<<02

DEPARTED
HEATHROW
2023

入国
NARITA
2022

CUSTOMS
CLEARED

🏦 FIRST NATIONAL BANK OF GENERICA

Statement Period: Dec 1 - Dec 31, 2025

Account: ****4847

Account Holder: ALEX M SMITH-JONESON

Employer Deposits From: ACME CORPORATION LTD

Date	Description	Amount
Dec 01	SALARY - ACME CORPORATION LTD	+$4,250.00
Dec 03	COFFEE ADDICTION SUPPLIES	-$87.50
Dec 05	STREAMING SERVICE #1	-$15.99
Dec 05	STREAMING SERVICE #2	-$12.99
Dec 05	STREAMING SERVICE #3 (DO I EVEN USE THIS?)	-$9.99
Dec 12	TOTALLY LEGITIMATE BUSINESS LLC	+$500.00
Dec 15	RENT - OVERPRICED APARTMENT	-$1,800.00
Dec 18	IMPULSE PURCHASE - 3AM	-$247.83
Dec 24	LAST MINUTE GIFTS - PANIC BUY	-$423.15
Dec 29	REFUND - RETURNED GIFT (AUNT DIDN'T LIKE IT)	+$45.00

Opening Balance: $2,847.23

Total Credits: +$4,795.00

Total Debits: -$2,597.45

CLOSING BALANCE: $5,044.78

WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL

Electronic Visa Application Portal

Democratic People's Republic of Absurdistan

MINISTRY OF VISA AFFAIRS & BUREAUCRATIC PROCESSING

SECTION 1: PERSONAL INFORMATION

SECTION 2: EMPLOYMENT & FINANCIAL STANDING

SECTION 3: SECURITY ASSESSMENT

SECTION 4: DOCUMENT VERIFICATION

SECTION 5: PAYMENT OF FEES

Fee Calculation:

📁 YOUR DOCUMENTS

CERTIFICATE OF MORAL CHARACTER

& GENERAL GOODNESS

YOUR PASSPORT PHOTO

🎉 CONGRATULATIONS! 🎉

YOUR VISA APPLICATION HAS BEEN...

SUBMITTED FOR REVIEW

⏰ TIME EXPIRED ⏰

YOUR APPLICATION HAS BEEN

PERMANENTLY DENIED

WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL

Electronic Visa Application Portal

Democratic People's Republic of Absurdistan

MINISTRY OF VISA AFFAIRS & BUREAUCRATIC PROCESSING

SECTION 1: PERSONAL INFORMATION

SECTION 2: EMPLOYMENT & FINANCIAL STANDING

SECTION 3: SECURITY ASSESSMENT

SECTION 4: DOCUMENT VERIFICATION

SECTION 5: PAYMENT OF FEES

Fee Calculation:

📁 YOUR DOCUMENTS

CERTIFICATE OF MORAL CHARACTER

& GENERAL GOODNESS

YOUR PASSPORT PHOTO

⚠️ SESSION WARNING

📊 QUICK SURVEY

🖥️ SERVER BUSY

❌ ERROR

🍪 COOKIE NOTICE

🎉 CONGRATULATIONS! 🎉

YOUR VISA APPLICATION HAS BEEN...

SUBMITTED FOR REVIEW

⏰ TIME EXPIRED ⏰

YOUR APPLICATION HAS BEEN

PERMANENTLY DENIED